Top 10 Mistakes Men Make While Dating Russian Women

HowToMarryARussianWoman.com

By Joseph Carducci

Here are the top 10 dating mistakes men make with Russian women (in no particular order after number 1!):

1. Sending a woman money: This is a huge no-no. Any Russian or FSU (Former Soviet Union) woman who asks you for money is just trying to scam you. She will either bleed you until you are dry (if she is very slick) or just disappear after a quick score (if you are lucky). An honest woman would not ask; she has too much pride. Besides, she has already lived for 20+ years without your “help.” Why does she need you now? A Russian woman does not even consider the two of you to be in a “real” relationship until you have met in person! Would you give money to American girl that you had just met? Would you ask her for money? Think about it. It is just not smart and sets you up for trouble (and makes the ladies think it is easy and encourages more of the same behavior).

2. Not being prepared to visit: You did know that in order to bring her over here as a fiancee, you must visit her, in her country? Yes, it is the only way she will be able to get a visa to come to the USA. For more details on the visa and immigration process click here. Honestly, though, an FSU woman, if she is serious, will want to meet you. You must be ready and prepared to visit her at some point in the future. It has been my observation (by watching and talking with both western men and FSU women) that a woman will generally give you about 6 months to decide you will visit. Then a few more months for you to get yourself over there. Make her wait longer than this and she will think you are not serious and probably move on to someone she thinks is! Just be ready: emotionally, physically, and monetarily.

3. Falling in love with a photo: Do not place too much emphasis on her photo. At least not until you know more details about her and her photos. Perhaps they are old. I once had a woman tell me her photos were over 2 years old! Her hair color and style was changed and it looked like she had gained about 20 pounds! Know what? It was my fault, because I did not ask her! Generally, the women of the FSU look even better in person than in their photos—and that is a huge compliment! But not always, and you do not marry a photo, you marry a real person. Get to know her, what she thinks, how she thinks, her dreams, desires, passions, hobbies, etc… Try to understand (as they say in Russia) her inner world.

4. Focusing only on one woman: Bad idea. You may get lucky and find the woman you end up marrying right away. I do know some people that things worked out this way with. I also know some people who won the lottery! Do not bet on this happening. You need to get over the idea of being a gentleman. This is, in it’s most basic sense, a numbers game. I heard it said that only 4% of US-Russian relationships are successful. With that in mind you will have to date and meet 25 ladies on average before finding your wife. This was indeed true in my case. I met over 150 ladies in person, and actively dated around 30 of them. Hopefully you will not need to go through this many. If you hang around at my site, read my articles, manuals, and use my consulting services, I guarantee you a heck of a lot better results! Writing/dating only one woman at a time is a bad idea. If it doesn’t work out with her, than you are back at ground zero and have nothing. You have to start all over again. Not to mention the time that you have wasted, and the money if you actually took a trip to meet her in person. We all want to believe in love at first sight, but many times you look at someone and she looks at you and you know immediately it is just not going to work. Sure, sometimes it goes perfectly, but will you gamble 3-4 months of your life and several thousand dollars on a trip to Russia just to find that out!? Most guys who are involved in this process (statistically speaking) are in their mid-upper 40’s…and most of the ladies are in their mid-upper 20’s. Do you have the time to waste? She probably does, but you need to be in contact with several women at any given time. Even if only for comparison purposes.

5. Not doing your proper research: By this I mean finding an honest and reliable dating or marriage agency, finding out all you can about your woman, learning about the geography, history, culture and language of the country she is from. These are all crucial to your success. You need to find an honest service. Then you need to educate yourself on other ways of contacting your woman. This will continue to ensure that your agency is honest, and that you are indeed writing to a real woman! Without doing your research you are just placing your bets (paying your money) and taking your chances.

6. Sending her the wrong photos: You do not need to send her photos of your house, car or other prized possession. If you do, I guarantee you will attract the wrong type of woman. An honest woman from the FSU is more concerned about your heart than she is about your possessions. If you focus on your money and things, she will probably assume you are a shallow and insecure person. Focusing on your possessions only seems to work on American women, the most shallow and insecure women in the world! This is not America, you do not need to impress these ladies with things! Show them your sensitive side, what you like to do, how you think and feel.

7. Thinking she is just after a visa: Then again if you thought this way, would you really be interested in writing her in the first place? Unless you were just interested in a business relationship type of marriage. She wants love and respect, not a free ride to America! Would you be interested in moving thousands of miles away from home, leaving all your family and friends, learning a new language, just to improve your standard of living? Neither does she. She does not want a savior, she wants a husband!

8. Thinking she will be your trophy wife: These ladies are tough as nails. They have to deal with drunk husbands/boyfriends who think nothing about going out and finding a mistress, don’t want to support their family (so she goes out to work), and generally most of the decisions and hard choices fall to the ladies. She will show you her claws if she thinks you are using her just as a “trophy wife.” Find someone to be your lover, wife, and equal partner, not someone you can dominate and control. For most men, I would say that even if they tried it would not be possible to control a Russian woman anyway—she is strong-willed and fiercely independent.

9. Not asking her questions: You are looking for a wife, not someone to just pass the time. Well, then again… Seriously, these are serious and honest women (for the most part) and they deserve the same respect. Besides, if you do not ask her questions to find out more about her, her family, dreams, goals, etc… she will sooner or later figure out that you are not serious. Then she will dump you, or just see what she can get out of you! If you are truly looking for a wife, you should be asking her all kinds of questions! Not only ask many different questions, but ask them several times in various ways, just to see if you get consistent answers (another good way to protect yourself from a scam).

10. Not having a back-up plan: This is a HUGE mistake! If you do eventually go over to the FSU, you never know what will happen. I once remarked to an agency owner that I had become friendly with, “the only thing I can count on happening here is something unexpected!” She laughed, but quickly agreed with me. I have been through an earthquake, watching the Twin Towers fall from a hotel room in Kiev, Ukraine, even being re-routed on a train for several hours due to a munitions dump explosion! And this does not even include all of the unexpected experiences I have had with the women themselves! I do not care how many letters you have exchanged or how many phone calls you have made, once you see her in person, things will change. Maybe you both look at each other and decide it will not work. Your back-up plan will protect you in this case. I do not advise making a trip just for one woman (unless you have already met). Meet several. Try to have good relations with at least one of the local agencies in the city you will be visiting (being on good terms with 2 or more is even better). Know their address and phone numbers. Then, if things don’t work out, you will be able to contact the other agency and meet other women.

That’s it. Keep these in mind as you progress in your search.

As always, if you have any questions, comments or concerns, I value you feedback.

Good luck!

Top 10 Reasons To Date a … Anyone !

6 Dating Mistakes To Avoid

6 Dating Mistakes To Avoid

DatingAgain101.com

When I decided to write about specific problems people have in dating, I wanted a list of six, but I wasn't sure right off that I could name six.

When I got done with my list, I had 24 problems--and that was just a "rough draft" list.

Dating is a problem, all right..........
..........And unfortunately there are behaviors many of us do that cause us more grief than good.

Coincidentally, there are six I consider most universal.

1. Letting Fear of Rejection Stop You.

If the person has told you several times to go away, sooner or later you ought to accept the rejection and move along.

For most singles, though, the problem is that they pre-reject themselves.

When you decide this person might not want to meet you, wouldn't want to talk to you, or probably isn't interested in getting married right now anyway, you have not escaped rejection.

You've simply kept them from rejecting you, by rejecting yourself.

What counts most in dating is your ability to meet people and to communicate.

Both of these are learned skills.

You aren't necessarily a big hit at first and you get better with practice.

Rejecting yourself guarantees you will not make any progress in that area.

Consequently the 'success' of any social interaction is not in a certain outcome, but in the fact that you got some practice.

And a fringe benefit I've noticed lately--people are much more understanding and tolerant of major flub-ups when the person is making a sincere effort than they are of minor flubs from people who seem to think they already know it all.

2. Get a Phone Number, and Then Not Call.

This is not to say that you absolutely have to call everyone you ever got a number for: sometimes you didn't especially want the number in the first place.

The error here is when you wanted to call, but factors such as being busy and/or being chicken interfered.

Then suddenly you realize it's been so long that if you call now, they may not remember who you are.

One man I know insists that you must call a new number within three days.

There is no need to make a date or any other future plans.

The call can be to simply acknowledge having met the person--"I just called to say hi and that it was nice to meet you at the workshop.

Then, says my friend, you can wait months to call again and it will be acceptable.

But never wait months to call the first time.

3. I don't care; what do you want to do?

On the first few dates everyone is bending over backward to make a good impression, so much so that sometimes we practically stand on our heads rather than to make a firm statement on anything, in case the other person doesn't agree.

This leads to many fun hours sitting around tryinq to decide what to do and where to go on your date.

Solution: if you have agreed to go to dinner, but can't decide where, each must suggest three places (for a handy list of six).

Then each says what they like and/or don't like about each option, weeding things down until there's only one option left.

In other words, if I say "Forget the chicken place," then you must make the next step, such as speaking well of steak or being hesitant about Hunan.

You toss choices back and forth until you've agreed to one. If you still can't agree at this point, now would probably be a good time to break up the relationship.

4. It HAS to be THIS person.

When you meet someone do you get a wild rush of feeling that you will die at any moment unless this person is absolutely crazy about you?

When you're dating, do you agonize over everything you say and everything you do, because this person has to like you?

Now if you tell me you've got to have a pepperoni pizza or you cannot live,

I'm going to be skeptical. If you're so starved you'll settle for dry toast, on the other hand,

I figure this is serious.

This is not to advocate the "Anyone will do" position, by any means, but to give you some perspective.

Yes, you need attention from people; after all, you're a social animal.

No, it does not have to be this person.

Relax. If Abraham Lincoln could figure out that you can't please everybody, you can get it too.

Every person to come along is not the last person to come along. Relax.

5. Watching television.

Watching television may be fine when you're alone and you're too exhausted to move, but it's death on a date.

The point of dating is to get to know each other.

Activities where you are mentally involved and where you interact with each other do the most to help you get acquainted.

Activities where you only observe and are not actively interacting do the least (next to not being around each other at all) to help you get acquainted.

Now if you watch a program and then shut the box off and have a lively debate, then dating is working for you. If you spend four hours sitting parallel in the semi-dark, you're wasting your time.

TV watching is tough enough on established relationships (again, there's no demand on you as individuals).

If TV is all you can think of to do on first dates, better quit dating for a while and spend your time on getting some interests in your life.

6. Too Much Time Too Soon.

Well, when it's working, it's working, and boy is it easy to spend more and more and more time together, especially in the first excitement of getting to know each other.

But sooner or later you are going to have to do your laundry, and visit your family, and see your dentist and taking time away from the relationship can be very difficult indeed.

There seems to be an emotional connection between amount of time and amount of caring, to some people.

And when you say, Listen, I'm going to need my Tuesday evenings free for a while, to some folks you've just carved off and thrown away a chunk of your caring.

While it is possible to negotiate spending less time together and still save the relationship, for most people it's very difficult.

The cure is at the cause; don't rush into committing major chunks of time.

Be alert for patterns. If you're about to ask for your fourth Tuesday date in a row, consider how easy will it be to not call next Tuesday.

Besides, relationships built a little at a time seem to be a lot more solid than those heaped together in a hurry and leave figuring out the details for later.

Top 10 Online Dating Mistakes

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.